Dude Bill #001

WHEREAS: Compulsive emailing is a deginerative disease which attacks the very sense of those that are unfortunate enough to be infected, losing all ability to rationalize that some people may not want to take a survey that ask what your favorite Hall and Oates song is (its She's Gone, by the way).

WHEREAS: I hate email, unless its from somebody I haven't seen in over a week and he or she has taken the time to send me a personalized email (or it happens to be the first email I have ever recieved from a sister of a dude whose name rhymes with flairoline--it can even be a forward--in fact you can diregard this entire post.)

WHEREAS: I continue to report FWD:'s from Melissa, Pigott, and Josh Kyle as spam to AOL, but fear if I block their entire accounts that the two aforementioned who live out of town might actually send me a personalized email, and this email will hopefully not berate me for anything I've posted on my blog.

WHEREAS: Its much more kosher to subject others to stupid shit on a blog, because those reading have opted to come to the worthless information, instead of forcing violating chain "make a wish" emails on others--emails that claim you will lose your left testicle if you dont forward this to three more people who also value their left testicle, so then you have to run a quick risk-loss analysis and decide that even though the chances of you actually losing your left testicle as a result of not sending this email are pretty remote, you have enough bad karma already so then you have to send the email to three buddies and hate yourself for 2 months.

Therefore: Let it be enacted on this day, March 9, 2005, that people who send forwards to John Lassiter (even if the subject line reads "You really have to read this" or "SO FUNNY, I promise" or "What Would the Frenchman do") either start a blog entitled These are the Stupid Forwards I Would Send You Except I Decided Not to Suck Anymore or be banned from the internet for all of eternity.


Bill Presented by: John M. Lassiter, Dude Representative since 1997

And you thought Michael Strong in Thailand was a little sketchy...

Well check out how this guy is making his cheese. This is an urgent read if you are an animal lover. It's Easter, Save Toby!

I am writing a Paper for the next couple of Days.

Check back Wednesday for an Update.

* My apologies for not pushing you towards better reading than you would ever find here. If you have a moment, check out my buddies' blogs--they are on the links on the right side of this page.

As a caveat, things can get kind of crazyin some of the comment strings,, so let this be your WORK WARNING.